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The Nightmare Monster Buggy of Wal-Mart

As I alluded to yesterday, I did not have the greatest shopping experience last week with the obnoxious Monster Sized Wal-Mart Buggy.

This image comes to mind…

monster cart

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As I’ve mentioned once or twenty times, I usually try to do whatever necessary to avoid shopping by myself with my three *beautifully behaved* {ahem} kiddos.

three kiddos

Despite, their angelic expressions, the experience does not leave their mother feeling verrrry happy… or verrry spiritual, for that matter.

Last week, however, I HAD to run out and get something on Friday and decided it would be quite dumb of me to be in the grocery store and not  get what we would otherwise have to go out and get theverynextday.

I try to be mature every once in a while, you know.

Well, since I survived the trip last week and so very much enjoyed NOT HAVING TO GO ON SATURDAY,  I decided I could be mature two weeks in a row and try to knock the grocery shopping out on Friday again… solo.

It’s always a dilemma for me deciding where to put all the kids and the corresponding groceries.  As well as the decision of ‘Should I get the monster buggy with the extra kid’s seats or try to wing it with the normal sized one that rational people use?’

In this case, I decided to go for the Massive Un-maneuverable Buggy in hopes that I would have room in the cart for, you know, GROCERIES.

walmart cart 2_thumb

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The concept is good.  An extra attachment that provides room for TWO kids to sit and leaves the whole buggy free for groceries.

But why-oh-why are those things SO HARD TO push?!

In the battle of Me vs. the Un-Steerable Cart, the score was Me = Zilch and Un-steerable Cart = 1 gazillion.

I’m pretty sure 99% of the time we were in the store, I was hunched over with my rear in the air trying my best to push that thing and NOT run into anyone.

There may have also been some huffing noises and muttered angst as well.

I also broke every grocery store rule ingrained in me as a child when I purposefully wheeled my enormous buggy right over to the deli, picked up the $2 cup of popcorn chicken and offered it to my three kids as a plea to not totally rip my sanity to shreds.

Popcorn-Chicken-Cup

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If I were any kind of a respectable blogger I would have snapped a pic of my munchkins chowing down, perched on their portable throne, but alas, I was desperately trying to make the most out of their preoccupation. and of course…

I was pushing a Monster Buggy.

It WAS lunch time after all, and it managed to keep them quiet for a few minutes at least.  It was a first, however, putting the EMPTY cup with only a few random crumbs up on the belt at the register.  Paying for it AFTER we ate it??  I’m pretty sure that’s just a gateway crime leading straight to shoplifting.  At the very least we have crossed over into redneck-ness.

I once again proved I am utterly moronic when after panting from aisle to aisle with my monster buggy, I was forced to ask another customer where on EARTH the sesame seeds would be.

I picked an older lady that looked like she would have spent a lifetime in the kitchen cooking with {what I consider} odd ingredients like say… sesame seeds.

Despite living the good old South, I do not make it a habit of speaking to random strangers, so this turned into a MAJOR FAIL for me, when I {of course} picked the nice lady that was hard of hearing.

Uh, yeah I did.  After the puzzled looks and asking me to repeat myself, she pointed me to her husband, while laughing about not hearing well and not having little kids anymore.

I didn’t know what the kid comment meant until later after they both started helping me look in the spice section {DUH!} and she finally realized what I had asked.

“Oh!  {Giggle} I thought you said Sesame STREET!”

The nice lady ended up saving the day when she found the blasted sesame seeds sitting right there in the spice aisle.

sesame seed

{source}

{Why am I so ridiculous?}  I am hoping this recipe I’m fixing today will be worth it.

I faced even more huffing and perspiration when I somehow managed to get the Enormous Thing WEDGED along side the checkout counter and could not get it to move forward all the way.

I tried backing up and getting it out of the groove.

I tried heaving with all my might and lifting the giant gerdie holding my two sons up and over to release it from its prison.

Lifting and heaving was to no avail, except for with every lift and heave,

Wade would holler, ‘WHOA!’ very loudly.

Uh, thanks.  That really helps my perspiring problem.

 

At least these kiddies of mine are cute.

three kids

A fact that helps moms everywhere NOT go bonkers.

What say you? Are you all ‘Mother of the Year Saints’ who regularly go shopping with all your kids along??

Please, please tell me I’m not the only one with an unholy abhorrence for the Monster Buggy?!

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*Sometimes I link up at these parties… Weekend Bloggy Link up, Bowl Full of Lemons, Somewhat Simple, Fingerprints on the Fridge, the 36th Avenue, Five Days Five Ways, and Someday Crafts. You should check ‘em out!!

26 Responses to The Nightmare Monster Buggy of Wal-Mart
  1. Heather
    January 17, 2012 | 12:16 pm

    Haha, I can't help but laugh at your story. You are a great story teller. I have a 3 year old girl and a 13 year old girl and I VERY RARELY go grocery shopping with either of them. But I have used Kroger's monster 'car' cart before and it is the same way! I actually knocked over one of their seasonal displays filled with boxes of valentine's candy and EVERY box fell out – I was super embarrassed! I've also had many a trips where I'm searching endlessly for some item that I can't find after 2 or 3 trips around the entire store!

  2. Bakershalfdozen
    January 17, 2012 | 1:44 pm

    I'm still traumatized from when my kids were babies and I had to take them all with me to the store by myself because hubby was on duty or deployed while in the military. It happened on a regular basis. Definitely not for the faint of heart. And it isn't redneck-ness to get that popcorn chicken; it is just Mommy smarts. :)

    Oh yes. The monster buggy. I have used those and found they work better if you pull it instead of pushing in. Of course, I had to buckle the kids in (good luck finding one with working buckles) and threaten them with death if they got up so I could be on the "other" side of the cart in order to pull it.

    I empathize, Renee, and remembering moments like these helps me get over any momentary desire for another baby. :) If I could get that baby to skip the toddler years, I might consider it more. LOL j/k

  3. Bernaedete
    January 17, 2012 | 1:45 pm

    I to have had days like this!! I hate the large carts…and while at first they were the best thing every…they have lost their power with my kids. They now want to play

  4. Liberty
    January 17, 2012 | 1:50 pm

    It's a plot. They don't want you to have more than 2 kids…. It's hard to go shopping with my one… so David or I will go alone– more often it will be him. But lately I have had a couple successful one hour runs with Hope— and I think it was because she was hungry and didn't mind sitting there eating crackers from the soon-to-be-purchased box, or grapes. It's not redneck at all! A small price to pay for peace. Oh, I used to think you were supposed to pay for it first. But kids will change everything. And don't we eat at sit-down restaurants first before paying?!

  5. Bakershalfdozen
    January 17, 2012 | 1:57 pm

    *pushing it

  6. Kathy C.
    January 17, 2012 | 2:20 pm

    lol you're so funny. I'm learning… still have a couple more months till I have a little one to share experiences with. This is great though. I'll have to be extra careful around those monster carts now. :)
    By the way… tagged you on my blog today…hope you get a chance to check it out! http://lovelacefiles.blogspot.com/2012/01/tag-im-it.html

  7. Susannah
    January 17, 2012 | 3:08 pm

    Haha, I took that same awful buggy with 3 kids to Walmart too! It was awful! And the chicken, yeah, you have to give them something to play with!! Ha!

  8. Twinmama
    January 17, 2012 | 3:20 pm

    Too funny! I can just picture you with booty in the air, huffing/puffing, pushing the Monster Buggy. The only other option is the 2 cart shopping: pushing one, and pulling one. I've had to do that…when my twins were still in carseat/carrier things. Both seats were in a cart sideways…being pushed, while the grocery cart was being pulled behind me. Now THAT'S "fun" rounding every end of an aisle…the grocery/kid train. :P

  9. Rachel
    January 17, 2012 | 3:25 pm

    Hahahaha, I have the EXACT same dilemma! I HATE going shopping with all three of them (although two is a perfectly manageable number.)

    Perhaps I'll sell one of them . . .

  10. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:26 pm

    Oh my yes, the car ones are almost worst with their awful awful steering. Wow, did you just keep walking or try to pick them up?!

  11. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:39 pm

    Ha! Yes, you are so right about the buckles. I wanted Davis to be on the inside for obvious reasons,but that one only had one working shoulder belt, so he was only half buckled in. Maybe I can try the backwards way next time…if I get brave enough for a next time. :)

  12. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:40 pm

    Good point. I'll try to retrain my brain. :)

  13. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:42 pm

    Hate to tell you this, but it's MUCH worse when they are teeny. There just isn't a good place for those car carrier seats!! When Davis was teeny, we would put him in our sling and then when he was a bit bigger the ergo carrier {the best baby carrier ever} which helped.
    Thanks for the tag! You asked some good questions!!

  14. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:44 pm

    Wow, I can't imagine the grocery/kid train. That would get me perspiring. :)
    I remember running into Dave back in the D-A-Y at Walmart {he was getting diapers, lol} and I think the boys were in the car cart? Twins is just a whole different ball game and a good reminder to be thankful for the struggles I have!! :)

  15. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:45 pm

    Ha! Good idea, but which one do we pick!!!! And you're about to add to your "problem" soon too!!

  16. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 17, 2012 | 3:55 pm

    Oh no! Don't tell me they will lose their appeal!! Wade only stood up a few times, so it captivated him surprisingly well for now! :)

  17. Bakershalfdozen
    January 17, 2012 | 5:46 pm

    Wal-mart needs to invest in the kind that have a double seat with steering wheels. Those keep the kids more entertained and contained. :)

  18. Motivated Mommy of two
    January 17, 2012 | 7:32 pm

    I have used one of those carts at Target before, and when I read your post I was laughing picturing my self pushing that thing around target with my butt sticking out because they are so hard to control. I made the mistake once of going grocery shopping alone with my kids, oh boy was that an experience. Never done it again, I might take my 4 year old with me but both of them together. My 2 year old never stays inside the cart and if his sister wants to get out he does too. If my husband does not want to go with me than he gets to stay home with both of them or at least one of them

  19. Laura
    January 18, 2012 | 12:21 am

    Too funny. My youngest is only 2 months old, so when we go shopping I have her in a front pack, one in the seat, and the other in the cart. The one in the cart often tells me she is too crowded!

  20. Kristi L
    January 18, 2012 | 1:40 am

    Haha!! I know, those carts are impossible. I actually started Express Lane shopping last week. Ohhhhhh so nice. Ordered online, stuck the girls in the car, drove up, they loaded the groceries in, and off we went back home! No getting out of the car!

  21. Heather
    January 18, 2012 | 3:13 pm

    I actually stopped and picked the entire thing up and put every single box of candy back on the shelf! Although they were not as neat as they were before. ;)

  22. Renee Living Laughing Loving
    January 19, 2012 | 7:49 pm

    Wow!! When Davis was little we did put him in the carrier, which meant Wade could ride in the seat, but that's not an option now. Wade does get crowded too in the car with all the stuff!

  23. Samantha
    January 20, 2012 | 2:53 pm

    Ha! That's how I feel about the 'car cart' at Lowes. My girls beg to ride in it- but I seriously can't push it. And half way through the store they refuse to ride in it. So then I am left struggling to push the beast through the store and chase them at the same time. I feel your pain!
    :) Samantha

  24. Laurel @ Ducks in a Row
    January 20, 2012 | 4:00 pm

    I agree – the carts are a monster!!

  25. Mom in High Heels
    January 20, 2012 | 7:28 pm

    Hopped over from Serenity Now.
    The monster carts have always scared me. I've never had to use one (thank goodness), but still, I am afraid. We live in Germany (courtesy of the US Army) and all of the carts for stores here have 4 free swiveling wheels. The back wheels are NOT fixed. They are a pain in the arse to steer if you have a bunch of stuff in them. Every time I go to Aldi to buy water (you do NOT drink the water here), it takes all my strength to get it back to my car. The next day my abs ALWAYS hurt. My abs might be in better shape if I went to the store every day and pushed the carts around. :)

    BTW, to get a cart here, you have to put in a coin to unlock it. You get your coin back when you take the cart back and re-lock it. This is GENIUS. There are never, ever (ever) any carts left in parking lots.

  26. Loving buggies | Bferironfabric
    July 8, 2012 | 1:02 pm

    […] The Nightmare Monster Buggy of Wal-Mart | Living Laughing & LovingJan 17, 2012 … As I alluded to yesterday, I did not have the greatest shopping experience last week with the obnoxious Monster Sized Wal-Mart Buggy. […]